In this episode of the Coastal Noise Podcast we're all about stand-up comedy. We talk crafting stories and jokes, stage presence, styles, and first time experiences. We discuss who think our the top dogs in comedy show biz and what elements make a great comedian. Louie C.K., Joe Rogan, Joey Diaz, Doug Benson, Ron White, Mitch Hedberg, Will Ferrel and Gilbert Gottfried are a few of the people we talk about. Daniel tells us about his recent trip to Hattiesburg to meet the folks of the Hub City Comedy organization and do a set at the Keg and Barrel. We all plan to go along for the next trip, so stop by have some fun with us. We riff on the new Kindle Fire "Mayday" button a bit and mention the new Dumb and Dumber To movie. After the show, we go down to the Government Street Grocery to do some stand-up of our own.
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In this episode of the Coastal Noise Podcast Doug gives us his thoughts on Tito's from Austin Texas. We talk about Houston's lousy traffic followed by a little bit of BMX and snowboarding. One of the big stories comes from ABC's 20/20 special on a father who recruited his son and daughter to rob banks. The story follows the dad who goes down hill with drugs and money problems and then conveniences his 20 year old son and 18 year old daughter to take part in a series of heists. I tell everyone how the man planned the robberies, how they got caught, and what happened afterwards. Revisiting previous themes from the last podcast, we talk about the Paleo Diet, what foods are safe and unsafe, grass-fed meats, fruit moderation, and a couple of our own experiences, as well as personal experiments in our eating regimens. Doug talks about new government policies that are being pitched around in regards to antibacterial products such as hand soaps, dishwasher liquids, and feeds for animals. Chris Gillespie, studying film in Arizona, drops-in and shifts the conversation to Bond movies, talking about how the older films contrast the latest installments in the franchise, with a greater since of misogynous lead character actions. We dwell on Bond topics for a while before moving to how movies are rated. What makes the difference between an R rated film and an NC-17? We also talk movies like Fargo, 12 Years A Slave, Eyes Wide Shut, This Film Is Not Yet Rated, Super Size Me, Super High Me, among others. Chris also mentions a new podcast by Doug Benson. Here is the latest episode featuring Joey "Coco" Diaz. We talk a little more about this podcast and others in the next episode with Ryan Vanskiver, Lyle Stephens, and Daniel Kavanagh where we talk at length about stand-up comedy. When I first watched "O Brother Where Art Thou?", I was probably about 12 years old. Back then, I didn't know what The Odyssey was, I didn't understand the true comedic value of the film, and, at such a young age, I probably didn't know much of anything in life that qualifies one to pass a critical evaluation on any kind of art form. But I did know, when the credits rolled, that the movie I had just seen was destined to be one of the top picks of my life. Over ten years later, it's still going strong with the position it holds with me. I remember asking for "O Brother" for my birthday or Christmas, one or the other, and of course received it, as my parents could obviously note my infatuation with it. When it did come into my possession on a VHS tape, I sat down to watch the film EVERYDAY for the next week or so. It's impression upon me was that great. I've come close to similar viewing intensities with movies like "The Matrix" (which is probably my #2 spot and deserving of its own article) and perhaps "Jaws" which is one I remember my brother watching several days in a week at one point in his life, but nothing like "O Brother". It seems only fitting that years later I regard the Coen Brothers as writers, producers, directors and, generally a knock out creative team, who ranks among the greatest of this generation. If you've been living under a rock and don't know what I'm talking about, see The Big Lebowski, No Country For Old Men (also at the top of my list), Raising Arizona, or Burn After Reading, to name a few. There are a number of reasons why I regard this piece of work as brilliant, despite some few minor plot holes that don't add up. I think the biggest draw for me was the music. Like a movie from the mind of Quinton Tarantino, "O Brother" was designed around the soundtrack, and it shows. Years before I picked up a guitar, the music of "O Brother" connected me to the blues before I even knew what the blues were. The gospel, folk and bluegrass aspects where also elements that I took note of, as well as the powerful dirges used throughout. The connection the film gave me to the past of Mississippi was also important. The movie is shot in the time of the Great Depression with a post slavery climate and blazing hot summer heat reflecting the hard living of the period. Seeing the contrast between the state's vast landscapes in scenes of open country and segments of small town life put me in the era. Both aspects are great to see, but it is the shots of the rural areas, the wood lands, and the desolate fields, all areas that strike me in real life, that I enjoy the most. When you combine the creative forces behind the whole project, the music and humor, the elements of Homer's "The Odyssey" with a stellar cast featuring George Clooney, John Turturro, Tim Blake Nelson, John Goodman,Charles Dunning, and a wealth of other colorful minor characters, you get a blockbuster picture that stands the time of cinematography. I wrote this article after watching the movie for the first time in over a year the other night. I recently saw some scenes of a 1990's version of the Odyssey, which motivated me to pick up the book, as well as a graphic novel version. I knew the readings would give me new insight into an already beloved film. All I want to do, is write about the different scenes in order and describe what makes them so great to me. It is merely my opinion and my interpretation of the film. If you read the article and have never seen the film, nor do you plan too, then perhaps my greatest hope is that you will change your mind, even after I have uncovered the plot. It all starts with the sound of hammers on rocks, as chained prisoners sing to the traditional song of "Po Lazarus", a tune deeply rooted in blues music, as armed deputies wielding fire arms patrol the unit on horseback. The atmosphere quickly shift from serious and exhausting as the first sound of guitar notes come into play with traditional vintage record quality. "The Big Rock Candy Mountains" by Harry McClintock plays in its entirety as the three escapees, Ulysses Everett McGill, Delmar O'Donnell, and Pete Hogwallop, take to the train tracks to avoid pursuit and to reach a fortune Everett has stowed in his homeland before a scheduled man made flood hits the valley. It is here "O Brother" has it's first important scene for me. After missing their chance to board a moving train, the trio spots a lone man operating a push platform along the tracks and run over to him, chains clinking as they move in unison, to join him. The man grants them permission to board without seeming to look at them. After they are seated, they look up to find the old man is blind. I noticed in this past viewing that the film has several characters, all of whom are blind or "sightless", and all seem to possess a connection with the spiritual world in different ways. More on this later. The crew question the lone traveler. "You work for the railroad grandpa?", Delmar asks. "I work...for no man." Comes the man's distant reply. "Got a name do you?" "I have...no name." Just as Everett, skeptical, science driven, and by all accounts an atheist, is about to give the old man a lesson in business marketing, the blind man cuts him off by prophasizing their hunt for a great treasure which they will find, though it is not the treasure they seek and the road to it will be long and dangerous. "You shall see a cow...on the roof of a...cotton house," the man says, and tells them they will press on despite the many obstacles they will encounter. A prelude to "Hard Time Killin Floor" sets the mood as the men stare at the blind man who never lifts his gaze as he speaks, lifting and pressing the lever which drives them forward along the tracks. At the end of monologue, the shot pulls back to one of the many gorgeous angles of the Mississippi country side, the newly free men looking out into the distance as the squeaking of the transport and the hushed acoustic guitar blend together to provide for the transition into the next segment. When the trio met up with Pete's cousin, Wallace, he frees them from their chains after a brief, unemotional greeting between the two family members who have not seen each other in over a decade. "How ya been Wallace," Pete asks. "S'been what, 12, 13 years?" "Yep," Wallace says. "I s'pect you want dem chains knocked off." And that's the extent of their hello. They find themselves at the dinner table talking shortly, and I wondered, as I have many times watching this scene: Has Wallace already made his mind about turning the gang in for the bounty? I think I found my answer this time with another shot in the following scene where the men are sitting around listening to "You Are My Sunshine" on the radio. In this scene, Everett is combing his hair and Wallace looks over at him with a look of discomfort and unease. I think this is about the time he has made up his mind. Everett, Delmar, and Pete get away from the law just in time and make their way to the outskirts of some wooded area as they debate their broken car that they have acquired from Wallace. Here we see a great minor role in the store clerk who doesn't have the parts for the vehicle, nor Everett's desired brand of hair treatment. "I don't want FOP, god damn it. I'm a Dapper Dan man." The clerk remains monotone throughout and is unmoved by Everett's outburst, and it really shows the classic country zen that old timers pick up dealing in a trade they have performed for countless years. Though the character is only on screen briefly, he contributes a lot to the vibe of the time and gives greater insight into Everett Ulysses's own personality. The crew considers their options in the woods over a course of freshly cooked meats. Gopher? As they are sitting around they begin to hear angel like voices on the wind as they are suddenly surrounded by men and women dressed in white gowns moving past them in slow steady, strides among the trees. "As I went down to the river to pray, studyin' about that good ole way, and who should wear the star lit crown? Good Lord, show me the way." The three follow the crowd down the a river side where, one by one, a preacher baptizes them. Everett laughs at the sight, but Delmar suddenly bolts for the water and jumps in front of all in line to be saved. Expressing his excitement at his salvation, Pete takes for the water at full sprint as well. The crew is driving along in their fixed car (which I'm not sure how is fixed, now that I think about it) when they meet the legend himself. Tommy Johnson (a parody of Robert Johnson) is standing at the crossroads where he has just sold his soul to the devil to play the guitar. "What the devil give you for your soul Tommy?" Everett laughs. "Well, he taught me how to play this guitar real good." "Oh son," Delmar says. "For that, you traded your ever lovin' soul?" "Well I wasn't usin' it," Tommy replies. It is in this exchange that the men find out what the devil looks like, as Tommy describes his features. Surprisingly, he claims the devil is white and travels around with a "mean hound dog." He then tells the men he is on his way to Tishomingo where he has heard rumors a man will pay good money to sing into a can. "He'll pay you extra," Tommy says, "If'n you play real good." "Tishomingo, huh?" Everett asks thoughtfully. "How much he pay?" Now, I have to stop to make an aside here for this part. The scene jumps after this question to the radio station, but I just want to state that I would have loved to see this conversation play out further. How the hell would it have gone? "Tishomingo, huh? How much he pay? Cause it just so happens, we're a talented group of singers, recently escaped from a chain gang and I have a hit song that's sure to go over really well. If we practice in the car here for the next couple minutes or so that it will take to get there, I think we could nail it in our first try!" Anyway, the group gets their destination where they meet the next blind man of the movie, who is the owner and recorder at the station. After convincing the man they are experienced in old timey material, the men break into the film's most popular number, "Man of Constant Sorrow". Back when the movie came out and I had no idea there was a soundtrack, I rewinded my VHS tape over and over to hear this three minutes of musical mastery. Just a guitar, some bluesy verses, and some call and return backing vocals. It didn't' need anything else. A while back I learned the song on guitar and did my best to know the verses. It was one of my favorite songs to play at shows, as it still holds a lot of power for me, and the crowd always seems to get a kick out of it. I was particularly thrilled at one show a couple months back when I convinced two of my friends to take the stage with me and perform the backing vocals. It went great, and my friends kept up even though some of the verses I butchered or made up as we went along. From his booth, the blind man nods his head about and, in what appears to be a mildly possessed state, hums to himself in delight, "yesss yeeeesss...". Later on in the film, the station owner talks to an artist contractor about how "powerful" the performance was. I'd like to think the man, due to his blindness, is tapped into a different kind of head space. One that has given him an almost spiritual connection with sound and provides him with a great purpose in his life as he seeks artists from all around to broadcast their talents into the radio airways and the heavens themselves. Shortly after, the gang crosses paths with Pappy O'Daniel (based on Texas Democrat W. Lee O'Daniel) who is running a difficult re-election campaign for governor of Mississippi. That night, Tommy Johnson shows viewers the darker side of what his exchange with Satan has done for his talent. He quietly picks out "Hard Time Killin Floor" on his guitar by the campfire, singing the tune's haunted verses: Hard time's is here An ev'rywhere you go Times are harder Than th'ever been befo' Um, hm-hm Um-hm Um, hm-hm Um, hm-hm-hm You know that people They are driftin' from do' to do' But they can't find no heaven I don't care where they go Um, hm-hm Um-uh-hm Mm-hm-hm Um, hm-hm-hm Tommy sings the song with such muted emphasis, the listener feels he is almost hearing the cry of a soul that knows its own eternal damnation. Meanwhile, the escapees discuss how they will spend their fortune when they reach the 1.2 million dollars that Everett has stowed away back home from an armored car job. The music is cut short when the men hear a police deputy over a loud speaker demanding they come out and surrender. The gang creep up and spot the enforcement unit setting fire to their nearby car, the sheriff and his hound have their backs turned to them. Tommy flees the scene, and the trio are quick to abandon their location as well. The next day the three encounter a flood of activity as they meet George Nelson who takes them on a bank robbery. When a woman calls him "baby face" the eccentric and wild Nelson becomes deflated by the remark. Later that night, Nelson solemnly announces he is going to take off. I had never noticed it before, but Everett gives Pete a quick nod as Nelson stands up. I had a sudden realization that they aimed to rob him right then and there when he turned to go. However, Nelson, in his depression, tells the three they can keep his share of the loot. The looks of astonishment on Everett and Pete's faces seem to confirm their original intentions. Nelson makes his exit, and they go on without him. Meanwhile, the radio station owner has been playing the track the gang cut in the studio under the band name, "The Soggy Bottom Boys" and the song is becoming ever more popular as Everett, Delmar, and Pete make their way further and further across Mississippi. Driving down the road in a stolen car, the men, like the crew from Ulysses's ship in the Odyssey, are drawn to rocky waters as three beautiful woman sing an entrancing song. The men are drugged and Pete is hauled off for the bounty placed on his head by the law. Everett and Delmar awake to find only a toad in Pete's cloths. Delmar believes the women have used magic on Pete to turn him into a frog and quickly scoops him up before leaving the riverside. The duo stop at a fine dining establishment (look closely and you can see a statue of Homer in the background). The two men order an expensive spread, which is over heard by yet another sight-limited character. Big Dan, played by John Goodman, is an eye patch wearing, charismatic Bible salesmen who ultimately secludes the two men, attacks them, steals their money, and squishes Pete, much to Delmar's dismay. Goodman plays the cyclops well in this role, and his career of choice, selling bibles, ties him in with the previous spiritually themed group of blind characters I descried previously. The only other addition I might add is the "The Man" himself. The sheriff that pursues the three men throughout the film, much like Poseidon, never takes off his sunglasses and the viewer never sees his eyes. The sheriff is also almost always seen in the presence of fire and claims the law is a "human institution" confirming his true identity as Tommy Johnson has previously described. He too is also in the same circle as the spiritual figures of the film. Gopher? Eventually, Everett and Delmar find their way to who Everett has really been looking for this whole time, his family. He sees his three little girls singing at a campaign rally for Homer Stokes, nemesis of Pappy O'Daniel. Everett goes to the girls after the number is concluded and his daughters tell him his wife, Penny, who is planning to merry another man, is across the street buying bottle nipples. This is a fantastic choice of line delivery from the girls on the directors part, as it reveals to Everett that his wife is shopping for a baby that isn't his. In disgust, he marches over to the store and confronts his wife who has been telling his daughters for years that he was hit by a train. It is here that Everett confronts his wife's new fiance, Walter, who is tall, skinny, and totally nerdy looking. When things become heated between Everett and Penny, the two men square off to fight. Walter, unexpectedly, ducks and dodges all of Everett's attempts before knocking him down with a very unorthodox fighting stance and a crazy combination of punches. Later, in a movie theater, Everett and Delmar sink into their seats as a police deputy enters the room. He blows a whistle and a chain gang marches into the theater and sits a few rows behind the two. It is interesting to note, the deputy in the back of the room, who is dressed similar to the sheriff and has a commanding demeanor, has eyes and a face that is not visible to the viewer, as dark lighting falls on his features. He seems very much like the minion of a greater evil. Soon, as the picture show starts up again, a hushed voice comes from behind Everett and Delmar. "Do...not...seek...the treasure." The two turn around and squint into the darkness, trying to make out the owner of the voice. It is Pete. Like the dead of Hades coming to give Ulysses advice for his journeys, he seems to have returned from the ether to warn his friends of the dangers ahead. Everett and Delmar stare dumbly. "Do...not...seek...the treasure. They're settin up an ambush. Do...not...seek...the treasure." He glances around, trying to stay unnoticed. The two men are now fully turned in their seats and Delmar leans forward, shock on his face. "We...thought...you was...a toad." Pete, confusion on his face. Delmar leans even further across the back of his chair and raises his voice. "Weee...tttthought...you was...a toad!" "DO...NOT...SEEK...THE TREASURE!" Their communication is severed when the deputy calls for silence and the men settle in to their seats. That night, Everett and Delmar break Pete out of his confines where he is being held captive. It is in this reunion that Pete tells the two he sold them out for the treasure in order to avoid being hung by the sheriff. When Pete begins to weep of his betrayal, Everett confesses that there never really was a treasure. He lied to the two because they were all chained together and he had to return home before his wife married Walter. His whole escape is aimed at the stopping of the soon to occur wedding. Pete, who only had two weeks left on his sentence and will likely die in confinement if captured again, rushes Everett in a rage. The men stumble down a hill and into the proximity of a Ku Klux Klan rally, where they spot Tommy Johnson about to be hung. This scene makes for another haunting blues dirge, sung acapella by Ralph Stanley, entitled "O Death". In the film, the Klan leader sings the song amongst burning crosses and marching members, his hands raised over all as he stands upon a wooden platform: O, Death O, Death Won't you spare me over til another year Well what is this that I can't see With ice cold hands takin' hold of me Well I am death, none can excel I'll open the door to heaven or hell Whoa, death someone would pray Could you wait to call me another day O, Death O, Death Won't you spare me over til another year The trio subdue three Klan members and disguise themselves in their uniforms. They take up the march behind the group that is leading Tommy up to the noose. The men whisper for Tommy but he tells them it's to late and the Devil has come to collect his due. Nearby, one of the Klan removes his hood and sniffs at the air. It is Big Dan, his one eye searching about as he recognizes the hair treatment that Everett is forever insistent on. He unmasks the trio, whose faces are covered in dirt, making them appear to be black men themselves. The Klan leader removes his hood also, revealing himself to be Homer Stokes. Everett, Delmar, Pete, and Tommy break away and throw a rebel flag tacked to a long stake into the air directly at Big Dan. "Don't let that flag hit the ground!" Stokes shouts. Big Dan stands motionless as the projectile hurdles towards his one eye. At the last moment he catches the stake an inch from his eye ball and the collective Klan is awed by his timing. While they are distracted, Everett clips the cable of the burning cross and it falls over, landing on the Bible salesmen ending his involvement in the film. The four amigos, now reunited again, agree to go to the Stokes campaign dinner where Penny is attending. Disguised as musicians, they infiltrate the building, much like Ulysses's disguise into his own kingdom to reclaim Penelope from her wretched suitors. Pete and Delmar buy some time by breaking into an impromptu performance of yet another great song, "In The Jail House Now". When Penny continues to brush off Everett, the group starts up with "Man of Constant Sorrow" forcing Everett to run to the microphone to take lead. The crowd goes nuts at the realization that they are the Soggy Bottom Boys, while Everett, Delmar, and Pete look at each other in confusion at the unexpected reaction. They carry the tune until stopped by Stokes who recognizes them as the ones who disrupted the Klan rally. He also discovers that the three are fugitives on the run and informs the audience present. The crowd, displeased that Stokes wishes to cease the performance, becomes angered. If you watch carefully, it is at this point you will see none other than George W. Bush step up to cast the first stone at the conservative politician. What a pleasant surprise. Stokes is carried out and Pappy O'Daniel seizes the opportunity, jumps up on stage, gives pardon to the men's crimes, and adopts them into his political office. Penny agrees to take Everett back, so long as he goes to fetch her Aunt's wedding ring at their cabin. The four newly freed men go to the cabin in the morning, only to find three men digging graves in the yard. Deputies step from the trees and surround them. The sheriff and his hound dog step from the cabin. The men plead with him and tell him they have been pardoned by the governor, who broadcasted the release on the radio. "Is that so?" The man questions. "Well, we ain't got a radio." And with that, the three grave diggers come out of the holes, and begin to sing a sorrowful dirge, "Lonesome Valley", encouraging the men to prepare for their journey into the next world. Oh, you gotta walk that lonesome valley Oh, you gotta go there by yourself Nobody else can walk it for you You gotta walk, walk it by yourself You must go and stand your trials You have to stand it by yourself Nobody else can stand it for you You have to stand it by yourself All three of the main protagonist begin to pray, but it is Everett who drops to his knees and speaks openly with the Lord. He asks for forgiveness and mercy, and that Tommy and his two friends do not deserve to die this way. Finally he asks to just see his daughters again, whom he has been parted from for so many years.
A trickle of water streaks past them on the ground. Another and another. A loud crash is heard and all present turn to stare down into the forest. A massive wave pounds through the woods, flooding the area and sweeps its way across all present in the yard. "Lonesome Valley", plays on as various items float by in the water. A gramophone, a large supply of Dapper Dan cans, the sheriff's hound dog, and so on. All three men resurface and grab to the wooden door floating by. Pete and Delmar begin ranting of God's mercy, hearing their prayers and taking pity on their souls. Everett, however, is not impressed. He tells the men they are foolish and reminds them that the valley was scheduled to be flooded just as he had told them previously. The land would be renewed with electricity and other modern technologies in the near future. As he finishes his speech, he sees a cow, standing atop of a roof. Everett looks at the cow for a few seconds in wonder. The viewer almost thinks he will have a sudden realization of the past prophecy foretold to him, but then he quickly looks away to spot Tommy, who is attempting to stay atop the roll top desk where Penny's ring is stashed. The film's final scene sees Everett and Penny walking down a street town discussing their re-marriage when Penny realizes the ring Everett has brought back is not the right one. She storms off upset with Everett trying to convince her that the other ring is long gone. She again blows him off and picks up her pace, their 7 children being pulled along in a row by a string around their waists. The girls sing a song that carries the movie out and the youngest of Everett's daughters, who is last in the line, stops on the railroad tracks looking into the distance. As the rope around her waist tightens, she is pulled after the girls and we see what she has seen. The lone traveling man is moving away from town on the railroad tracks, still on his push platform, and humming along to the girl's tune. "O Brother Where Art Thou", is a tale of epic proportion for me. Every time I watch it, I marvel at how all the events that take place in the film do not even amount to two hours of screen time. Yet still, it feels jam packed with one grand scene after another, filled with interesting characters who are well scripted, incredibly deep and moving music selections, fun cross references to Homer's Odyssey, and great shots from all around Mississippi. It really is an ace of a movie. One that I will no doubt see many more times in my life with new discoveries in every viewing. This is my tribute to the Coen Brother's masterpiece. Here's to hoping they create many more grand adventures in the future, and that this particular film will be a landmark for all others seeking a great treasure in the world of cinema. Care for some gopher? You hear't right (I felt like saying that), last night, while reading through Dr. Loren Cordain's book "The Paleo Diet Cookbook" I found the basis for an interesting snake idea. The credit for the premise goes largely to Dr. Cordain, but I have modified his recipe by taking it to several next levels in my opinion. The end result is versatile and pretty damn good no matter how you make it. And, not to forget of course, easy. If you listened in on the last Coastal Noise Podcast (#16), you may have heard us talk a little bit about the Paleo Diet, what it is, and how I've been implementing some of its principals into my own diet for a personal experiment. I'm currently looking about a few books and online sources for what the deal is with dairy products, such as grass fed butter, and flour alternatives, such as almond and coconut. But as I was reading through one of Dr. Cordain's books, I found this incredibly good looking recipe that aims to replace "energy bars" for athletes with wholesome sweet potatoes infused with almonds. I took the concept and ran with it. Not even an hour ago, I tasted my first completed batch and was very pleased. This is one I'll be keeping for the books. Here is what I did and what you'll need. The measurements for the side ingredients (the nuts mostly) are rough, but you can modify the amount based on your taste preference. Be sure to check back again soon, as I plan to make another article about my "Paleo Flour" discoveries. Ingredients: 2 sweet potatoes A handful of almonds A handful of sunflower seeds A handful of dark chocolate chips A teaspoon of ground cinnamon Coconut flakes to top with Dash of salt Preparation: Cook the potatoes. You can do this in the oven or microwave. Blend the ingredients you have chosen out of the almonds, chocolate, and sunflower seeds in a blinder or food processor to make. Cut yams in half, lengthwise after they have cooled. Sprinkle the blended ingredients over the yams and using your spoon, press or mix into the potatoes. Top with ground cinnamon and a little bit of coconut flakes if desired. Cover with plastic and shape into a roll. Place in the freezer for thirty minutes to cool. Enjoy In the Coastal Noise Podcast episode #16, Daniel and Jeff talk about their recent trip to New York City. They talk about city's legendary water quality and great food they had from places such as Pies and Thighs . They also talk about some of the art they saw, including a strange indoor maze made of metal, whose construction, due to its weight, took the lives of several men to bring to its final construction. We then transitioned to a lost topic from the previous Coastal Noise Podcast episode 15, where technical difficulties lead to the loss of a section in the show where we talked about pro athletes marketing junk food to kids. Studies from Rudd Center for Food Policy and Obesity at Yale University are showing that foods that are energy dense, nutrient poor are some of the biggest products promoted by professional athletes. Worse yet, the viewers who see these advertisements for pizzas, chips, candy bars, snack foods, sodas and other sugary drinks, are primarily kids aged 12-17. Almost all endorsed beverages (93%) got %100 percent of their calories from sugar. Seeing as kids want to be pro athletes almost more than anything when they grow up, the results from the research are disturbing. Continuing on with health related topics, we discussed raising livestock and health standards in America's meat industry. We talked a little bit about the Paleo Diet (see link for Dr. Loraine Cordain's website) and what information I've been collecting on it, as well as what steps I'm taking to impalement this eating regimen in my own diet. I plan to have own two new guests soon, Anthony Lizana and Doug Morrison, who both have experience with Paleo eating and can give us more information on this trending diet. The diet of past may very well be the diet of our future. I left my seat in the middle of the show to get some water and, while I was away, discovered that Paul Walker had died. No one else at the table had heard yet. As an aside, I told the guys about the 92 year old Texas woman who kicked a burglar in the face when he tried to break into her house, not expecting to find her there. When things got hairy, the man tried to kidnap her and, while forcing on one of her shoe, she dominated his face with her heel. She plans to buy another gun for her home. "Maybe next time, I'll use it". You go granny. Other news included Jeff's pineapple is fully grown and is decked out with Christmas lights. Spoiler alert though: He's gonna eat it real soon. In spirit of the announcement, I looked up some interesting facts about pineapples during the show. Camal Petro arrived on the scene, and since he's the sports guy, I had to stop to talk about the Alabama vs. Auburn game that had just concluded an hour and a half ago. The group talked about how incredible it was and what it meant in the continuing season. Camal Petro wrote an article and photographed the recent Mississippi Gulf Coast Marathon held at Stennis Space Center yesterday for the Sun Herald. You can see the full story here. Closing discussions included Black Friday Injuries and Death counts, which have been tallied up over the last several years and Jacob Skrmetti's plans to record a home album with his fellow band mates at Mississippi State University. CNP #16 is available here. Thanks for listening everyone, and Merry December! A few months ago, I stumbled on a podcast that Radiolab was doing that centered around a live show they were putting on called Radiolab Live: In the Dark, a show they were performing around the country at the time with the help of Demetri Martin. The show moved through three acts, with the last phase, "Dark Side of the Earth", being a recorded audio interview with astronaut Dave Wolf, who tells a story about being 200 miles above space and how every 45 minutes his crew would experience complete darkness followed by blazing light as the sun screamed into view. Tethered to the outside of a their spacecraft, traveling 5 miles per second, disaster strikes as they our faced with the inability to regain entry into their craft. The show also explores the tranquility of space, as Dave spends several minutes floating outside the ship, staring into the emptiness of the universe. During this segment of the live show, every member of the audience has white light laser pointers that they shoot to the ceiling to replicate stars as ambient music plays in the theater. Just listening to the podcast version in my car, I was amazed out how the show sounded, and wished I could have experienced the live show. Just recently, my interest was resparked in a similar fashion when I listened to another interview with astronaut Chris Hadfield, author of his newly released book, "An Astronauts Guide to Living on Earth". In the interview, he talks about the incredible changes the body goes through in space, which inspired me to look further into what exactly goes on, and how astronauts prepare for such rigorous travels. Without gravity, our bones, muscles, and cells do not work as hard, which causes a lot of interesting side effects, both short and long term. Here are a few bullet points on what happens when an astronaut goes into the great unknown: Loss of Muscle and Bone Mass: Astronauts must work out two hours everyday, seven days a week, in order to maintain a healthy level of bone and muscle density. Without exercise, the crew would have difficulty performing tasks in space and, if an emergency occurred, it could put the team in a very vulnerable position due to weakness. The loss of bone mass can also make it difficult to walk after returning to Earth. Physical therapy is undergone when the crew returns home to regain size, but getting back your bone mass can be difficult if a lot of it is lost. Although it is not fully understood why, the human body excretes a large amount of calcium and phosphorus when the body becomes weightless, causing boss loss. Going from Mars to Earth would result in the same equivalent of half a lifetime on Earth for our skeletal system. Proper training at home after return can take months to fully restore the lost bone mass. Abnormal Blood Circulation: In a zero gravity environment, our blood flow is disrupted. Usually, our blood must work against the continues pull that we experience on Earth, but in space, this normality is removed. This results in a rush of blood to the upper body much faster than what humans are accustomed to, since blood does not pool as much in the legs. All those yoga poses you see people do with their feet in the air with their head on the ground make a lot more sense now, right? All of this leads to an increased heart rate and raised blood pressure. Side effects include headaches, nasal congestion, and super skinny legs. Space Sickness: You think it's bad out at sea? Just wait till your floating hundreds of miles above the Earth's surface with no sense of balance. Vomiting, headaches, and general dizziness are the norm. In fact, almost half of all space travels experience these symptoms the first couple days of flight. Lack of Balance: Our sense of orientation relies heavily on inner ear and muscular sensors to find terrestrial clues about our environment. This system is rendered useless when in an anti-gravity situation, making astronauts feel disorientated or uncoordinated. Instead, the crew must use visual cues to establish the barrings, but even this can be difficult as the notions of what is "up" and what is "down" are completely irrelevant in space. No doubt, this is a big reason why the team can become so prone to motion sickness. Weaker Immune Systems: Scientists have been analyzing studies done in space that show lack of sleep and isolation may weaken an astronaut's immune system, making the susceptible to sickness and infection. This is caused from a weaker than normal T-lymphocyte system which could lead to allergy problems as well. Being an unfamiliar environment, astronauts will have to work harder to combat these changes in the bodies as scientists work to find new drugs to aid them. Disrupted Sleep: Think you get cranky when you don't get your full eight hours? Astronauts must deal with constant noise from the space shuttle and experience irregular shifting patterns of light and dark depending on where they are in space in relevance to the sun and the planets. Fatigue can easily set in, especially with the disruptions of the human's normal day/night cycle. You Stink: "Welcome to Space: Please Don't Use The Water". This could very well be the motto of most space flights. In an environment so perilous, you can imagine the precautions astronauts must take to keep rations of water stable. This means strict regulation of water distribution. And when water is used, you can bet the first priority is going to be for drinking. As for cleaning yourself? Well, lets just say it would be best to imagine yourself on a long camping expedition. Astronauts are given a plentiful supply of moist towelettes to use for daily scrubbing, but showers are more of a luxury experience. Best keep your distance from your co-workers if you want to be polite. As you can see, astronauts have their work cut out for them. Every new journey into space is another chance to experiment and improve the living conditions they must endure. Let's hope they smooth out the rough stuff before they begin taking volunteers for the flights to Mars. And, by the way, that's coming very, very soon. Sources:
Click here to hear Radiolab Live: Dark Side of the Earth -------------------------------- Your Body in Space: Use It or Lose It Known effects of long-term space flights on the human body Gravity Hurts (So Good) What if an astronaut went on a space walk without wearing a space suit? I will be playing a show Tuesday, Novermeber 19th at Toast: Ultra Lounge and Bistro @6pm. Come by and join in on the free wine tasting that will be taking place. coastalnoise.com/musicdates The last couple days I've been debating back and forth about what kind of article I'd like to put out. I've got a list of growing topics and I have let several days go by doing light research on different ones and pondering them over, waiting for one in particular to really spark my interest and get me to sit down to start writing. Of course, I know the burden largely falls on me, and I can't wait around for inspiration to strike much more. As of lately, I've been considering putting an emphasis back into eating vegetarian "based" diets. I say, "'based", in quotes because I believe some leaner meats are easier on the body in the long and short terms, so I will not omit them completely. Going off of my feelings at the time, I reserved a vegetarian cookbook from the library in the mix of some other reads I had selected for the next couple weeks. Once I had spent some time looking through my new book, I started thinking about a diet that still implemented meat and turned my attention to the Paleo Diet, which has become popular in the last few years. This diet, suggests eating a diet that is similar to how our Paleolithic ancestors ate for tens of thousands of years before man began his agricultural endeavors, which, according to Paleo proponents, has totally screwed us. Evolutionarly speaking, our bodies are geared toward certain types of food (meats, nuts, seeds, vegetables, greens, and fruits) for optimal digestion and nutrient absorption. Foods such as breads, wheats, legumes, diary, and rice my go down easily for most, but the argument is that our body does not take as much from these foods because of counter active anti-nutrient properties that put our digestive system on the defense, among other reasons. A picked up and read Robb Wolf's, "The Paleo Solution" and found the information interesting and compelling. I had begun planning my shift to the Paleo diet for a personal experiment of one month's time. However, I thought it might be best to do some additional research to see what others have written in regards to a vegetarian or vegan diet up against the caveman diet. So I dove in the internet to research and take notes on what was being studied and discussed. That's when things started to get hairy. I knew that the different camps greatly opposed one another and all sides argue different reasons and cases for why their way is the best optimal diet for humans, but the more I searched, the more I saw how complex the science could get. It's like listening to an atheist and a bible salesman having a spiritual debate when all you want is to have a nice Sunday picnic on the grassy knoll. Yes, there was random Kennedy reference in there. My plan was to write about my findings and perhaps discuss my plan for a Paleo switch, but the rabbit hole seems to go so deep that I cannot possibly put my findings down and be satisfied with what my output would be. I would feel like I had left something out, missed important case studies for one side or the other, say something incorrect about a particular diet, or generally just not have all the facts together. Until I can get more information in a way that seems to make a better complete puzzle, I will hold off on my Paleo breakdown. In the meantime, I've already found my local Grass Feed Farm which I plan on ordering my grain free meat from, should I choose to make the commitment. All of this still left me with another big problem. I didn't have anything to write about! So I reflected back to my vegetarian cookbook. I'm not gonna lie, I made two dishes from it and they were both bomb. The first, a mushroom soup, complete with leeks, onions, cream, and plenty of vegetable broth and thyme. Throw in the baked French bread and I had a solid meal on my hands. The second was even better, and this is what I've decided to put down for tonight. It's not Paleo, but it IS damn good and pretty easy to make. Just make sure the kidney beans you get don't have chili sauce in them because it will make the dish more liquidy. I make this warning because...well, I bought kidney beans with chili sauce in them. If I don't make one shopping mistake when I go to the grocery store, then I'm probably somebody else. Taken from: "Vegetarian: The Best-Ever Recipe Collection" by Linda Fraser Sweet and Sour Mixed Bean Pot Ingredients: About 4 potatoes 1 tablespoon olive oil 3 tablespoons butter 1/3 cup whole-wheat flour 1 1/4 cups tomato sauce 2/3 cup unsweetened apple juice 1/4 cup each light brown sugar, ketchup, dry sherry, cider vinegar and light soy sauce 14 ounce can lima beans 14 ounce can kidney beans 14 ounce can of chickpeas 6 ounce green beans, chopped and blanched 8 ounces mushrooms, sliced 1 tablespoon each chopped fresh thyme and marjoram salt and freshly ground black peppers fresh herbs, to garnish Directions: 1. Thinly slice the potatoes and boil for 4 minutes. Drain the potatoes thoroughly, toss them in the olive oil so they are lightly coated all over and set aside. 2. Place the butter, flour, tomato sauce, sherry, vinegar, and soy sauce in a saucepan. Heat gently, whisking constantly, until the sauce comes to a boil and thickens. Simmer gently for 3 minutes, stirring. 3. Rinse and drain the beans and chickpeas and add to the sauce with all the remaining ingredients except the herb garnish. Mix Well. 4. Preheat the oven for 400F. 5. Spoon the bean mixture into a casserole. 6. Arrange the potatoes slices over the top of the casserole, overlapping them slightly and completely covering the bean mixture. 7. Cover the casserole with foil and bake for about 40 minutes, until the potatoes are cooked and tender. Remove the foil and cook another 20 minutes to lightly brown the potatoes. Serve garnished with fresh herb sprigs. In my last post, I talked about my recent travels to Colorado in my longest entry so far, complete with pictures. During my last night there, I taught some new friends a game I learned in college called, "Killers & Villagers", a psychological mystery game that only requires people to play. The first time it was taught to me, we played till three o'clock in the morning. The great thing about this game, is that the more you play it, the more you understand how your friends operate and manipulate one another, which you can use to your advantage in future rounds. It's also a lot of fun to hold "lynching" sessions during the game's "day" period in which you vote on players to eliminate. Below, I will outline the rules for this addictive game and give a brief history of its fascinating development by Russian, Dmitry Davidoff, who dates the first game back to 1986 at the Psychology Department of Moscow University.
Killers & Villagers Players Needed: 6 or more Player Types: 2 Killers. The rest are Villagers. Set up: The game consists of two teams (Killers and Villagers). Both teams work to eliminate the other. Roles are chosen at random by drawing folded, labeled strips of paper out of a hat. Make sure nobody knows what the other players' roles are. Once everyone has gotten their role, fold the paper back, and have the papers collected again and set aside. The first round can now begin. Elect someone to be the "moderator". This will be the person who dictates the flow of the rounds as described here. Have all players "go to sleep" by putting their heads down and secularly closing their eyes. At this time, the two killers in the game will learn each others identity to better work against the villagers. The moderator will now say: "Will the two killers acknowledge each other". The two killers will lift their heads and seek each other out in the group. Once they know each other, they will put their heads back down to "sleep". This should take no more than five seconds. Players can make tapping noises to help avoid hearing the killers move about, which could ruin the game. After a few seconds, the moderator will say: "Everyones' head should be down...and now, all players wake up." The game now goes into its second phase of "day time". This time is now spent with players analyzing, questioning, and accusing each other as they try to figure out who the killer is. Players can communicate to one another why they are innocent and who they believe is guilty. Players will call for votes to eliminate who they believe one of the killers is. Once more than half of the players vote for one particular person, that individual is eliminated and is now out of the game. He or she is now a spectator from then on. It is VERY important that spectators, who will now be able to see who the killers are, does not reveal their identities, give hints to still living villagers, or anything that would compromise the remainder of the game. It should be noted that killers, though they work on the same team, can turn against each other if they feel their own life is threatened and they need to divert the heat elsewhere. The game cycles back into the night time period, in which the killers will, once again, look at each other, so that any eliminated villagers can know their identities. The game then cycles back into the day period, in which questioning and voting recommence. The process continues in this fashion until one team is eliminated. It will be the duty of those previously killed off, to confirm which side is eliminated first. (*In regards to the moderator, a individual can play WHILE being a moderator if they know what they are doing. You can also have a person who does NOT play the game, and acts solely as a moderator who has no influence on the game.) Like I said, the more you play, the more you learn how twisted your friends minds are as they lie, deny, and turn the tide. Seeing what mannerisms your friends adapt as they prove their innocence or lie to your face. I hope you get a chance to try it, as it can keep your party entertained for hours. Enjoy, and please check out my last post, "Colorado Travels" to read all about my time in the Rockies. Here's some more info about this game, originally titled, "Mafia (party game)" sourced from wikipedia: Mafia (Russian: Ма́фия, also known as Werewolf) is a party game created in the USSR by Dimitry Davidoff in 1986,[2] modelling a conflict between an informed minority (the mafia) and an uninformed majority (the innocents). At the start of the game each player is secretly assigned a role affiliated with one of these teams. The game has two alternating phases: "night," during which the mafia may covertly "murder" an innocent, and "day," in which surviving players debate the identities of the mafiosi and vote to eliminate a suspect. Play continues until all of the mafia has been eliminated, or until the mafia outnumbers the innocents. Dmitry Davidoff (Russian: Дми́трий Давы́дов, Dmitriy Davydov) is generally acknowledged as the game's creator. He dates the first game to spring 1986 at the Psychology Department of Moscow State University, spreading to classrooms, dorms, and summer camps of Moscow University.[3][Note 1] Wired attributes the creation to Davidoff but dates the first game to 1987,[4] with 1986 being the year in which Davidoff was starting the work which would produce Mafia. He developed the game to combine psychology research with his duties teaching high school students.[4] The game became popular in other Soviet colleges and schools and in the 1990s it began to be played in Europe and then the United States. By the mid nineties a version of the game became a Latvian television series (with a parliamentary setting, and played by Latvian celebrities).[5] Andrew Plotkin gave the rules a werewolf theme in 1997,[6] arguing that the mafia were not that big a cultural reference, and that the werewolf concept fitted the idea of a hidden enemy who looked normal during the daytime.[4] Mafia and a variant called Thing[Note 2] have been played at science fiction writers' workshops since 1998,[7] and have become an integral part of the annual Clarion[8]and Viable Paradise[9] workshops. The Werewolf variant of Mafia became widespread at major tech events, including the Game Developers Conference, ETech, Foo Camps, and South By Southwest.[4] In 1998 the Kaliningrad Higher school of the Internal Affairs Ministry published the methodical textbook Nonverbal communications. Developing role-playing games 'Mafia' and 'Murderer' for a course on Visual psychodiagnostics, to teach various methods of reading body language and nonverbal signals.[10] In March 2006 Ernest Fedorov was running a Mafia Club in Kiev, using his own patented variation of the rules. The club organizes games, rates players, and awards prizes (including a Sicily trip for their tournament-series champion).[11] In June 2006, a Rockingham school inquiry was launched after parents complained of the traumatic effects classroom Mafia was having on their fifth-grade children. Davidoff responded to the reports, saying that as a parent who had studied child psychology for 25 years, he felt that the game could "teach kids to distinguish right from wrong", and that the positive message of being honest could overcome the negative effects of an "evil narrator" moderating the game as if it were a scary story.[12] Mafia was called one of the 50 most historically and culturally significant games published since 1800 by about.com.[13] Although the game can be played with a deck of poker cards or slips of paper, Looney Labs successfully marketed a commercial version of the game as Are You a Werewolf?, which was later followed by Asmodee Editions' Werewolves of Millers Hollow, Mayfair Games' Lupus in Tabula and Bezier Games' Ultimate Werewolf.[citation needed] A Cthulhu Mythos variant (Do You Worship Cthulhu) was published in 2006.[14] My time traveling through Colorado was well spent. I enjoyed myself thoroughly despite set backs described in my previous post. I covered a fair amount of ground, exploring downtown Denver, a large portion of its northwest corner, Red Rocks, the small, old miner town of Idaho Springs, and even managed to record a spontaneous podcast on my flight with a fellow from Fort Collins named Levi Wall.
(Pictures of my trip are included below. You can hear the podcast with Mr. Wall here: http://www.coastalnoise.com/podcast.html) Upon landing I promptly retrieved my bags and awaited my Colorado connect, Hoard. He arrived like clockwork and after a brief introduction, we made our way west to the highlands. My first true day in Denver, I was treated to the spectical that is Red Rocks. Like many of the finer details of Colorado, especially its nature aspects, it is very difficult to describe just how impressive Red Rocks is. From the top of the highest seats, the city of Denver stands majestically in the background, the town of Morrison just off to the right, a cozy town tucked into the mountains which is granted the privilege of baring witness to the grand image of Red Rocks on a continuous basis. Bleachers descend toward the stage and exercise enthusiasts run the lengths of each row, which I'm told equates to two miles. I am granted to a real treat as a trio of tourists take to the stage to test the legendary acoustics that the venue is noted for with a run of the, "Star Spangled Banner". Everyone present watches, some with hands on their hearts, as the group reaches their conclusion. Over the notes of the the three singers, you can feel the stillness in the air, along with the strange external silence that is present just beyond the song itself. The rock formations on each side carry the music clearly up to where I stand. The crowd erupts with applause and the ameuter performers drop their serious demeanor for comical bows of gratitude. Below I see the museum where lists of past performing artists adorn the wall. Phish, The Grateful Dead, The Eagles, The Beatles, Hendrix, Blues Traveler, Ben Harper, Jack White, The Allmen Brothers, and the list stretches on. Group viewings of old films are posted with Donnie Darko, Pulp Fiction, Woodstock, Office Space, Anchorman, The Big Lebowski...A series of titles, one after another, that would all be good fun to view in such a place. I listen briefly as Willie Nelson proclaims his love for the venue in a short video, then browse a wall full of memorabilia of past shows. A signed Tool with King Krimson poster catches my attention. Leaving Red Rocks, I see their are several trails that branch off that runners take to as they begin their morning exercise under the clear blue skys accompanied by a mild chill made bearable by the warm, beaming sun. Before seeing the main street of Denver, my friend shows me to a Jazz bar where live music is being performed for lunch. Over the course of my meal, a rotating cast of musicians come and go from the stage: Two piano players, a guitarist, a drummer, a stand up bassist, a xylophonist, and several singers. Overall, it makes for a great introduction to the heart of city life. Next comes the downtown region of Denver, 16th Street. A quick walk through shows a rich diversity of restaurants, clothing stores, coffee houses, bars, shopping malls, and, of course, dispensaries. By the end of my trip, I will have visited the downtown area twice and neither times does the foot traffic feel to congested or hectic. People stroll about casually, reflecting a calm and relaxed vibe I come to associate with Colorado more and more. Much like in Boulder, many people walk about with their canine companions. Free buses go up and down 16th Street shuttling people where ever they wish to go on the strip. One of the city's biggest parks near Capital Hill comes next. I'm told many first time residence move to this area, mostly young adults. The park is large indeed and I see a gaggle of geese take to a near by open space to graze. Runners with dogs make their way along the length of the sidewalks next to the lake and even though the skyscrapers of the city are so close, it is oddly quiet as I stand behind the park museum that doubles as an Imax, where elementary school students are leaving from a field trip. I have many moments like this during my stay, in which I wonder how such a busy city can sound so subdued. Before the evening sets in over the park, I discover that there is an isolation tank center not far from where I'm staying called, A New Spirit. I stop in to see if they can fit me in for a float. They are booked, a fact that actually makes me happy as it shows the tanks are getting good use. The lady behind the counter tells me you almost always have to reserve a tank a week in advance to be able to float. Having just had a discussion about isolation tanks in the last podcast with Levi Wall, I was very eager to check out their set up. After seeing both tank rooms I tell them I may return before I leave Denver. Over the course of the next couple days, I call every morning to find any previously available slots taken. Though I would have loved to have floated for an hour, I was still glade to see the popularity of the tanks growing. Later that night, I'm sitting at Hop and Pies, where I'm told the thin pizza crust is made with a secret recipe that makes it melt in your mouth. I test the claim with a mozzarella cheese pizza with sundried tomatoes, caramelized onions, and whole roasted garlic cloves. It's a knock-out. I end up eating an extra slice or two because they do, in fact, seem to melt away with ease. Before leaving, I have also gotten the chance to sample a beer of my choice. Colorado, being a state of numerous breweries, offers a wide variety of beverages year round. I taste the "Grasshoppa", a local gluten free, cider beer that had a texture and taste more in common with a champagne than a beer. I good drink. The next day I hike up a trail in Jefferson County, about a half hour drive from Denver. Later on, I walked through the old mining town of Idaho Springs which lays snuggly between two mountains, one which has a small waterfall. The town is only a single mile in length and has a population of 2,000 people, most of whom live up in the mountains. Dinner that night was in one of Idaho Springs popular downtown hangouts where one could grab a bite and play a game of pinball on over a dozen of the restaurants operating machines. I met a couple who had lived in the town for a time and had just bought a cabin up in the mountains. We talked through dinner and then parted ways just before a pinball tournament was scheduled to start. Before leaving, I recommended to my two new acquaintances that they consider looking into the Gulf Coast area for a warm winter home, for they were seeking such a place as they were both nearing retirement. Getting the urge for a late night snack once back in Northwest Denver, I made a brief walk to the local grocery store, Sprouts. Stores like this are abundant around Denver, since its citizens regularly demonstrate against chains like Wal-mart, demanding the franchise stay a certain distance from the center of the city. A quick bit of research seems to confirm this, and Google maps show any Wal-mart stores more towards the outskirts of the city. I wouldn't be surprised if someone told me McDonalds gets similar treatment in these parts. At Sprouts, I browse the selection of food and notice a great deal of in house made products and organic options. The day before I had two slices of the stores home made bread and proclaimed it the greatest bread I've ever eaten from a store. With a whole store of delicious food before me, I decide on a bundle of organic kale...of course. After I prepare my greens (which also turn out to be fantastic) I watch, Lincoln, on the television as I get ready for bed. After it ends, I'm still somewhat awake and decide to watch whatever show is on the previous channel, which happens to be South Park. Since I'm in the state where the show takes place and I haven't seen an episode in years, I let it play. Kenny battles the forces of Hell with God's golden PSP, which he designed to find Heaven's new version of Keanu Reeves. It's awesome. After seeing Daniel Day Louis age 20 years in the course of two and a half hours, I was in serious need of a good laugh. The funniest part of Lincoln was finding out Tommy Lee Jones is sleeping with his maid. He really is a Man In Black! Boom! The following day, I become acquainted with a new group. Through a family friend, I meet Allie who has been living in Denver for several years and has roots in Atlanta as well as Ocean Springs, my hometown's neighbor. She tells me she met Two Chainz, the rapper, last night while out on the town. She has the picture to prove it. It's an impressive introduction and I wonder if she casually meets other celebrities on other nights of the week. With one of her friends, we make our way to Rootdown, which is serving brunch. The food and atmosphere at Rootdown is exceptional. At our table we have a fried egg sandwich, steak and eggs, home style potato fries, fruit and my own plate of almond flour buttermilk pancakes with pear sauce and maple syrup. The rest of the day is spent hanging with more friends who live around Sloan Lake. As it starts to rain, we make ourselves comfortable indoors watching the Bronco's game, playing Mrs. Pac Man, card games, Apples to Apples, and Killas and Villagas. I will have to write an instruction guide to this last one as it is a great psychological, mystery game to play with friends and family. We have to tare ourselves away from the festivities as it gets late into the night. In a previous round of Apples to Apples, I put down a Big Mac card. Now, everyone wants to grab a late night snack at McDonalds, which debunks my previous theory about its receptivity in the city and also greatly opposes my previous late night snack of steamed kale the day before. My new friends laugh at me when I order oatmeal, but I laugh back when they discover their French fries are cold and I'm the only one with warm food. The window workers also get a good laugh as they read the sticky strips of paper we have had stuck to our foreheads for the last several hours. On them, is what can only be described as, ridiculous shit. The night concludes as we part ways and the next morning brings better weather. I take a stroll through the neighborhood to find somewhere to eat breakfast. Not finding much of a selection, I settle on the Family Dollar, of all places, where I stock up on trail mix, sunflower seeds, an assortment of dried fruit, and instant noodles. My flight doesn't leave till seven at night, which gives me a few roaming hours in the city's downtown. By mid-afternoon I head to the RTD station to make sure rush hour traffic doesn't prevent me from making my flight on time. On the bus, I meet a guy who says he has lived in Colorado for 10 years, but now resides in Idaho. When I ask him why he would ever leave such a place for Idaho, he tells me he moved at the suggestion made by his meditation teacher, who he has been practicing with for several years. I can tell he probably thinks that I think he is strange for saying such a thing, but I tell him I have seen several Buddhist meditation centers around Denver these past couple days and admire the city's diversity of spiritual practice. I hoped this might put him at ease, and sure enough we had an enlightening conversation for the remainder of the ride to the airport. He even extended an invitation to me to his groups yearly winter retreat which lasts a month long in a city just east of Pueblo in the southern region of Colorado. I thank him even though I know I cannot make such an event. My travels are concluded for the time being, although the idea of a month long retreat is an interesting one. At the airport I wish the fellow traveler a safe return and make my way through the terminal routine. The TSA lines are short today. I sit by my gate, 3 hours early, and listen to podcasts and finish my book, "Never Cry Wolf". When I get home, I will pick up the first book of the "Salt" series by, Maurice Gee. The flight is delayed another hour and a half. I tell myself it's better late than never and think back on the airport story from my last article. Yes, definitely better late than never. On the plane, I begin writing about my journey while its still fresh in my mind, but don't finish it for another two days when I am at home and spending time with my baby niece, who has learned a new phrase while I was away. I am told, just the other morning, she walked up to my brother-in-law and said, "change my butt". Yes, everyday she becomes more and more sophisticated and it is a joy to bare witness to. I have certainty missed her in my time away. She, along with the rest of my family, make up a big reason why even the most beautiful places like Colorado, will never have it all. I will be thinking long and hard about my future return to the west, and in what regards my next trip will be for. What ever the reason my be, I look forward to seeing the Rockies again very soon. Until next time, Colorado. Stefan It had to happen eventually. After becoming somewhat use to the process of moving through airports during the few travels of my life without issue, it was only a matter of time before something had to go wrong. Last year, I flew to Boone, North Carolina to see my sweet heart of a friend Kayla, then took off for Boulder, Colorado to couch surf before heading to Portland, Oregon for a three day conference on business management in running Isolation Tank centers. I went to all these places in a matter of days, with my biggest of problems being I needed to switch a flight. Besides that, I have flown over seas to Europe, Jamaica, and other parts of the US without much of a hiccup. However, Jesus couldn't get around in airports without having a few bad days eventually. It just so happened that today was my turn, and the set backs were a major drag to say the least.
I did my best to stay relaxed and get rested last night and did so by picking a movie from my Netflix selection, which only seems to get bigger as I rarely sit down to tackle the films I pick. I am sure this a problem many users have. I narrow my selection down to Requiem for A Dream, a JFK documentary, and a South Korean mystery, psychological thriller called Oldboy. Thinking I might see some kung fu, I choose Oldboy, not knowing how ever discovered this moving (I later traced it back to a Tony Jaa movie I watched a few months ago, Ong Bak 2, that turned out to be a roller coaster ride of one crazy fight scene after the next....check it if your down with "the arts"). I have to tell you, because I respected this movie so much after seeing it, Oldboy is badass. I could write an entire blog on it (and might just) but I will merely wet your pallet here to encourage a viewing. Oldboy is a movie from 2003 that follows the story of a drunken man who is kidnapped and imprisoned for 15 years before waking up one day in the outside world. He then tries to figure out what has happened to him, why people believe he murdered his wife while still confined, where his daughter is, who the man who kidnapped and restrained him is, and how to kill him. I won't say anything more for now. Just see it! After the epic conclusion, I go to sleep and wake to make my journey to MSY Airport. Despite leaving two and a half hours early, I greatly underestimate the level of morning traffic in New Orleans. Wish someone had given me the heads up about this. Sometimes, the price of experience is great. With time running short and a series of muttered curse words already uttered under my breath I struggle for several minutes to find the parking garage I'm supposed to use. I get to my destination and literally sprint through the entrance of MSY. My flight isn't scheduled to leave for another forty minutes. No problem...or so I think. Upon arriving at the check-in desk, a stoner looking character who is twiddling away on his phone looks up and says, "Nah man, planes already closed." You gotta be kidding me. No worries. Since I wear my sunglasses at night, I keep my calm and try to talk with the guy to see what can be done. Nothing, he says. This guy... Two other people come in and are denied access. One goes into a rage. I'm thinking if we all raise enough hell someone will let us on this damn tin can, but nobody seems to be here except the monkey behind the counter. Finally, the manager shows up, and kindly tells us the plan has departed. Thank you. You have been very helpful. "Can we get another flight out today?" "No, there are no more flights today. The next one will be two days from now." What the shit! Do you people send one plane out and then call it a day? So now, if I take this reschedule, I will miss two days in Denver and will either have to find someone to stay with in New Orleans or go back home, only to make the return drive Saturday. Not happenin. "Can we get refunds since you wouldn't let us on." "Hmm, I don't know. Call this number to see." Spoiler alert: You DO NOT get your fucking money back when Frontier Airlines decides they won't let you on your plane. To make a long story short, I was on hold a half hour before I was told this by an agent who said it as calm as a Hindu cow in a much less exciting way. I did my best to seem angry and super inconvenienced (which I was in both regards) but it's hard to play the part when I know that the defusion of responsibility is so great, that no matter who I talk to, nobody is truly at fault for my predicament and can't really do anything about it. If anyone can be blamed, it's me. But please, for the love of God, don't make me admit that. At least not today. So I'm still trying to figure out what I will do about my predicament. I have my contacts in Denver who are expecting me know what's up and they kindly help me look for alternatives. My sweet mom, at home with my niece who can be a handful, is now dealing with her frustrated son who has her also searching for a way out. My Denver friend makes the suggestion I keep my return flight with Frontier and book a one way flight with someone else today. Hey, why let all the money go down the drain? Might as well use them for something, and they do owe me a return flight. It's a solid idea, besides the fact it will cost me a pretty penny. Something that is not adding to my totally awesome mood. I ask my mom to scan the web for flights. She confirms a finding by my Denver friend and I go to book it. Then, I get the e-mail. Frontier Airlines has canceled my return flight that they owed me. #$@*! $##@! Or something like that... And so...I find myself on the phone, on hold, AGAIN, this time for an hour since nobody is at the Frontier desk anymore (Remember? Because they sent out there one 9am plan for the day and then went to the stripe clubs). I sit with another one of the abandoned Frontier flyers who was with me earlier and see she is also trying to make it work out. The other girl who was left in the cold took the Saturday flight like a conformist, but hey, you do what you have to do, I'm not haten. Anyway, I'm still sitting there, me and this other lady, both of our phones on speaker waiting for someone to pick up. The same hold music is playing in sync from both our phone speakers. The scene could almost be romantic if we both weren't considering arson. I haven't eaten today and have been up since six thirty and I'm refusing to do so until I have a plan of action. With my luck, by the time I get this return flight reinstated, the ticket I wanted to purchase to get to Denver will already be bought by someone else. Thankfully, I get my return back without saying nasty things into the phone. I book another outgoing flight. At the end of the ordeal, I have paid a $300 mistake and now have a flight course that, instead of my original 2 hour non-stop, will take all day to complete, and I will have lost an entire afternoon in Colorado. On top of all this, I am exhausted from everything, including my few hours of sleep last night. The TSA lines are extra long today and my first hour in the terminal I secretly wish I could just go home. I realize I still haven't eaten. I brought two packs of "emergency" oatmeal in my book bag for days I go hiking or whatever other reason. Having spent more than twice the amount of money I expected to spend before even leaving the airport, I decide, I am indeed, in a state of emergency. In this state, purchasing the normal $10 sandwich at ANY airport restaurant is instantly out of my broke ass trip budget. And so, I break out a pack of oatmeal, pour it into my water bottle, and drink my first meal of the day at twelve o'clock at the B7 gate. After that, I do something I never though I'd do successfully in an airport terminal. I fall asleep laying on the ground, my backpack and bundled hoodie as pillows with the sleeve draped over my eyes. I wake up and walk around waiting for my flight. My cousin Hope sends me a picture that one of her students has drawn for her projects. Its the Slender Man. Its pretty awesome. I start reading a book that I pulled from the shelf at home called, "Never Cry Wolf", a true story of a lone Canadian biologist who goes to the Arctic to live and study wolves for over a year. It draws me in and the time passes. Before long, I am boarding the flight and feeling better. I release my frustration I had toward Frontier. I don't hold it against them. For the first time that day, my excitement is restored for my trip. I don't think about the extra money that has gone from my pocket. It is in the past, and I am on my way now. I don't think of my lost day in Colorado. The mountains will still be there to great me in the morning. What is done cannot be undone and I will not live with the problems that existed a few hours ago. Fair weather is in my future, I am sure of it. Colorado, take me in. Stefan |
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